Vertical forgiveness doesn’t excuse any action or restore a relationship. It is a choice to free ourselves, to begin healing.
I must forgive the offender, for my benefit- Yes, for my benefit. This is one of the pieces many of us miss in forgiveness. We must go through vertical forgiveness (between me and God) before we move to horizontal forgiveness (between me and another person).
Trusting God’s character, strength, love and protection, we place the entire list of consequences into His hands. “I trust God will not mock me, or ignore this, or forget my pain. I trust He will protect me and defend my heart, bringing beauty out of hurt. I trust He will cleanse me as He promised.
We hand the entire matter over to the only One who can see the entire story, who loves both us and our offender perfectly. The whole incident moves out of our sphere, and into God’s. This allows us to live free, regardless of how our offender chooses to act.